Friday, December 18, 2009

Cash strapped for Christmas?

This year with the dreaded economy (ugh I am so sick of that word this year) Jon and I decided we weren't going to exchange gifts. Aside from the fact that it can be expensive it also adds that much more stress of finding the perfect gift(s). I was sitting and thinking about it one night and came up with something that could be both fun and inexpensive at the same time. I came up with an idea to try and find the worst possible gifts with a ten dollar budget. Where is the best place to go for something like that, and where can you get the worst bang for your buck? Any 99 cent or dollar store. Those stores often have some of the most random things. We decided to buy ten items, or ten dollars worth whatever came first (yes you can get things there for LESS than $1). I can't say what I bought Jon since it isn't Christmas yet but I have to say that it was probably the most enjoyable Christmas shopping experience I have ever had. I laughed the entire time! So if you are having a hard time this year and decided not to exchange gifts try something like we did. Now we each have at least 10 things to open on Christmas morning and will enjoy doing it :)

Sunday, December 13, 2009

I want it now!

I'll be honest, when I started this blog I expected it to be funny and fun, but lately all I find myself doing is bitching and I should probably apologize for that. However, this post will be yet another unfunny one. I want to meet the people who came up with the phrases "Everything happens for a reason" and "Just think positive" and "It always gets worse before it gets better" so I can ask them how the hell they came up with that, AND just how long it take for this thinking positive thing to pay off. Oh yeah and how come no one ever explains what those reasons are?? And WHY does it get worse before it gets better?

We are going on two months now of Jon being out of work and it is frustrating. It has been hard for me to adjust too especially around the holidays. I love to spoil my family with gifts around this time and it is so upsetting that I can't really do that this year. Yeah yeah I know that's not what Christmas is about but for me it is. I love to go overboard on Christmas it is very gratifying for me and it only happens once a year. I honestly would go out and get a job to help out but no one is going to hire a pregnant person especially when you take into consideration of how far along I am. So Merry Christmas honey.....I paid the power bill!

I have been such a broken record lately that I have been getting on my own nerves..."I'm tired, I'm stressed, I'm worried, I can't sleep, what are we going to do, heard anything?" and so on. Being pregnant is for sure not good for the anxiety I have about everything, but there really isn't much I can do. All we can seem to do is continue to "think positive" and do the best we can. I try my hardest to remain positive but it does get tiring, also I have a little problem with patience, I hate waiting and when I want something I want it now. I'm sure we all have a little Veruca Salt in us, it is just more apparent in some than in others.

I can only imagine how I sound..oh boohoo you can't go crazy on your family and shower them with gifts this year..whaaaa but whatever that is how I feel. I know there are people out there who are losing their houses and can't afford to pay any of their bills let alone buy Christmas gifts (and I AM thankful to not be in that position right now) but these past couple of months have made me feel empty. All I can hope for is that this passes soon and things will get back to normal. I hope for everyone that this time next year is much better and this country isn't in such shambles. Lets all just try to think they say

Thursday, December 10, 2009

And a Merry Fricken Christmas to you too!

What is it about the holiday season that turns so many into mean, rude, unsympathetic, "move it or lose it" people? I thought this was a time where we embrace each other even more and are supposed to be kind and nicer than normal. Maybe it is just the places I am going or it is just the way the times are now....I have no clue but it is so damn annoying! People at the stores are rude and cut in front of you, grab things you are grabbing for and sometimes just pretend you aren't there. I know it is so stressful around this time and everyone wants to get in and out and on with their lives but come on! It just seems that people suck more this year than last.

It isn't even just the regular stores that are bad, my most recent experience at thee grocery store was enough to slap someone. It was raining (which should have been my first clue to stay home since no one knows how to react when it rains here) and I decided to stop in Smiths to pick up a few things. It started in the parking lot. I had my blinker on waiting for a car to pull out so I could have the parking spot and a car comes from the other side and steals my spot! Yeah I know it happens all the time but I never do that especially when someone has already "claimed" it by using their blinker. Ugh whatever so I decide to let it go (not without shooting them a dirty look of course) and find another spot.
Once inside I make my way down to the salad aisle and stand back so that people can walk down the row or so I don't block anyone elses view and this guy and his wife walk right in front of me and start looking too. It was as if I wasn't there, or they saw me and figured I was standing there for fun. I just stood there, I didn't say anything I just stood there, and waited for them to get what they needed and move on. However, they didn't, the man literally stood there inspecting every damn bag of salad for at least 5 minutes. Finally I made my way up there (I may or may not have nudged him out of the way a little bit ;) and grabbed what I needed, while he was STILL inspecting bags of lettuce. Those little instances continued throughout the shopping trip, things like people standing in the middle of aisles with their carts and not moving even though you say "excuse me", being bumped into and so on. The meanest thing happened to me in the parking lot on my way out.

I am visibly pregnant pushing a cart in the rain making my way across the designated crosswalk in front of the store, I get halfway across and this guy in a truck decides he doesn't want to wait for me anymore and decides to pull out in front of me. His truck was so close to me that my face was maximum 5 inches away from his drivers side window. I contemplated ramming my cart into his truck but inside yelled some obscenities to him and just hurried up to my car. At that point I was so done with that night I just wanted to go home.

So you know be nice out there! Slow it down and try not to be in a rush, or if you are don't be a douche, say a Merry Christmas or something a flash a smile

Saturday, November 28, 2009

New baby worries

I know just a few months ago I was bitching because I wasn't able to get pregnant right away,but now I have a whole new series of bitchisms. As my belly grows bigger so do my fears and worries. First of all, this pregnancy seems to be going exteremely fast, so fast that some weeks I forget just how far along I am! I have come to terms that this baby is in fact a boy (I may or may not have had more confirmation) and I am very happy and excited about that! As I am so excited for all of these changes it hits the hell am I going to do this??

How in the world am I going to be able to give BOTH kids (wow that sounds weird to say) the same amount of attention? How do I make sure that Braden doesn't get neglected or pushed aside while I am trying to take care of a newborn? How do I keep a happy face when I have had 2 hours of sleep, been puked on, peed on, and havent had a shower in days? I am hoping these are all normal fears worries and questions! I am also pretty sure that it will be one of those things where it just comes to me and somehow I magically know how to handle everything (Braden is 4 so I have done something right so far!!)

I am also more fearful of delivery this time around too. I suppose that is thanks to the terrible experience I had with Braden. At least when I had him I didn't know what to expect so it wasn't so scary, but this time I have something to look back on and it scares the crap out of me. Braden's delivery was probably a weird fluke thing, but I can't help but be fearful that the same things will happen again. I also have a strong feeling that I will go into early labor again too but hey I also swore this baby was a girl...WRONG!

I guess it is just hard to picture myself as a mother of 2, but 4 years ago I couldn't picture myself as a mother period and so far so good :)

Saturday, November 14, 2009

When I woke up

I don't know if I am finally starting to grow up, or if this baby is doing everything it possibly can to make me a better person but I woke up this morning with a very strange mentality..I just don't care anymore! I have been obsessively mad about my stuff being hacked into, and people going waaaay too far and beyond trying to get the latest scoop on me. I just realized how dumb they are. I mean who resorts to stuff like that just to know what is going on with someone 24/7? I guess I have to just come to terms with the fact thaat I have a little stalker..awwwww! I guess I am that important that they want to know everything about me. So since I am almost positive they are reading this right now. I have an open letter for them and all of you to see :)

Dear Stalkers,

I don't know what it is about me that intrigues you so much, but I must say I am almost flattered. I spend my days doing important things like taking care of my family, paying bills, tidying up around the house, playing some Roller Coaster Kingdom, watching my soap, and holding the fort down until my husband gets home. I realize that my life is so totally interesting and scandalous but it makes me wonder what your lives are lacking to be so obsessed with mine. I thought for sure you would be more concerned with your own things like figuring out how you are going to have room in that house for all of those people, maybe how you are going to dig yourself out of the debt hole you have created, what movie you are going to take all those people to next, what you are going to wear to the Renaissance Fair next year, writing to George Lucas begging him for yet another installment of Star Wars, and oh yeah taking care of your family. You know if you had put half the effort into your finances and life that you put into me maybe things could have turned out different for you. All the countless hours on the internet trying to get into my stuff or find some dirt on me should have been used trying to gather information on how to better your own lives. I guess what I am saying is I have more than enough important things going on in my life to keep me occupied. I know that priorities have never really been your thing, but unlike you I know the definition and it is important to me. So please, waste some more of your time and energy on me if that makes you feel happy and fulfilled. I'm not going to try and stop you anymore and I'm not going to get mad. I will just feel bad for how obsessed you are with me. Maybe one day in the future while I am trying to run my household you will pop into my mind, and if that happens it will put a smile on my face because I will be able to picture you sitting on a computer feverishly trying to see what I posted on my Facebook today....well I will save you the trouble today.....

Brittany Andrews had a Bagelful for breakfast this morning..mmmmm

so riveting!!

Priority: Precedence, especially established by order of importance or urgency

I know you're hungry!

If you live in Las Vegas you have to check out Vito's Pizza. It is a place that I used to go to with the bff a lot. They just relocated pretty much up the street from the last location, but it is still the same awesome food and atmosphere. Pizza, pasta, sandwiches, you name it they can make it!

Their new address is:

2525 W. Horizon Ridge Parkway #180
Las Vegas, NV 89052

(702) 269-6895---call for FREE delivery

Check out their full menu at:

Also become a fan on Facebook here:

They have free delivery and they also cater (they catered my wedding yummy)...go get some pizza!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

How to avoid being worlds worst dad

There are a lot of things that bother me. In fact, I'm sure too many things bother me. However, nothing bothers me more than someone turning their back on their family. It is disgusting and should be embarrasing to that person. Although I am sick to death of dealing with, seeing, hearing, and talking about a "man" I know. I keep writing about him to show others how not to ever ever act. I won't go in to too much detail about what happened only because it is too long, but I will say that your children should always come first. To help those out there who may not know I have compiled a list of things fathers should live by to make them better, because I know of at least one who could really use this

1. Your children should always come first no matter what

2. It is not ok to let your new young ugly wife scream, swear or punish your child

3. NEVER let your new ugly wife spread nasty things about your child on the internet

4. ALWAYS defend your child, children are forever, ugly wives may not be

5. STOP finding a way to blame everyone else but your new ugly wife

6. Tell your new ugly wife to shut up once in a while

7. It is ok to spend a day alone with your child, cut the leash for a day

8. Don't make a promise if you intend on breaking it

9. Adoption is serious and shouldn't end when the child turns 18

10. Just because she is young enough to be your daughter, NO you cannot adopt your wife

11. If you chose an ugly wife over your children they will move on

12. Using children and their emotions to get what you want is a no no

13. If your child has a child it does not make you an automatic grandpa, that title is earned

14. If you leave a gift on a doorstep for the child of the child, the child will give the gift to charity

15. Just because you are a man doesn't mean you have balls, well maybe you did but now she keeps them in a jar on her nightstand

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

The big question

Well I had my ultrasound yesterday to find out the sex of the baby and much to my surprise I was told it is a boy. While I am happy that the baby is looking very healthy and on schedule I can't help but be in complete denial that this baby is a boy. I was so completely positive that it was a girl...I only picked out girl things, names, etc. I feel like my "maternal instincts" are crap and for me that is a hard thing. as a mother you rely on those insitncts to get you through raising your child. I read a study that said over 75% of women correctly predict their child's gender before getting confirmation. I guess I am not in that percentile. When they told me the baby was a boy, I will admit I broke down, not because I am mad, but because I am disappointed in myself for even getting in way over my head before I knew for sure. I do need to make it known that I still love this baby the same as I did the moment I found out I was pregnant and that won't change. I am just so confused as to why I can not accept the fact that the doctors are right. I blame it partially on the fact that just a few weeks ago the same doctor said his guess was a girl, so part of me wonders what makes him so sure this time? I know in the back of my head he is probably right but I can't seem to shake this gut feeling that I am still right. I probably sound like a crazy person but I just feel so stupid! I am so blessed and so lucky to be able to have children and I never take that for granted....I know there are people out there who can't have children and would die to be able to do so. I am not ungrateful and I know once I accept I was wrong (which is always hard for me to admit no matter what!) I will comeback and read this and feel even more stupid for writing it in the first place,but for now it is theraputic

I did feel better when the ultrasound tech comforted me while I was crying. She stopped and looked at me and said "Oh its ok honey, I cried when I found out I was having a second girl." I have also talked to many people who told me they broke down when they were positive they were having a certian sex and found out they were having another. Like I said before I think it all comes from your reliance on your maternal instincts, and when you are wrong you just feel devastated and start wondering if you ever have them, at least I did. For now Jon and I have been trying to think of boy names (which is so much harder for us) and repick our baby stuff so that it is boy friendly, something tells me a baby boy just would not have much interest in pink bedding or a pink stroller lol! I will continue to have ultrasounds throughout the pregnancy and will post pictures soon :)

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


THIS is the only thing I want to eat right now. It is perfect in every way and makes me happy inside. I hardly put any meat on it because it seems to be too overpowering. The sandwich has to have LOTS of tomatoes and lettuce and I pretty much drench it in balsalmic vinegar ( and also dip it in too) I don't know how long this love affair will last but it it damn good right now.

P.S. Is it ok to drink balsalmic vinegar? I haven't but I won't say I haven't thought of it either.....

Thursday, October 15, 2009

No more wondering when

When the phone rang this morning at 5:20 am and I saw Jon on the caller ID I thought to myself "he either got laid off, or he is hurt" thankfully it was the lesser of the two and Jon told me he got laid off. It really sucks hearing that. A million things start running through your head. Can we still afford this, or that....are we going to lose the house, is there any work anywhere, is this more temporary than permanent or vice versa? Jon has told me (as he always does) not to stress and I laugh when he says that, sure I'll just shut that switch off in my head and everything will be fine. I knwo he is probably worried too but he doesn't show it as much, as he knows I worry more than enough for both of us. There are a few prospects for him getting right back to work, afterall it is all about who you know in this city. Hopefully something pans out and soon. I am thankful that he has been able to keep working this long as I know there are so many out there who have been out of work for months upon months. Send us positive vibes and think happy thoughts :)

Monday, October 12, 2009

Stupid Ass People

I think we are all guilty of some mild road at least at some point in our lifetime. Throwing your hands up, maybe flipping a bird or two, tailgating after someone cuts you off, but I am seeing it more and more how out of control people can get over NOTHING.

Saturday was starting off as a really good day, aside from being sick. We had to go to the mall to return some stuff and were also planning on getting lunch or something. I was getting ready to make a right turn onto Sunset from Stephanie when this white Corolla decided it needed to get over. Well if any of you have ever tried to get to the mall on a Saturday afternoon you know how much traffic there is in the turn lane. There was nothing I could do but keep going, there was no reason for me to slam on my brakes and get rear ended because some dumbass didn't know where they were going, so I kept on my way, as I did after all have the right away since I was in my lane.

The car in front of me stops and is waiting for oncoming traffic when all of a sudden the Corolla jumps the curb and pulls along the drivers side of my car. He is ON THE CURB screaming and yelling at me because I wouldn't let him over. Then he says (in so many words I will edit) "What is wrong with you??? I have a kid in the car and you don't let me over?" He is not talking to me he is SCREAMING at the top of his lungs, pulled up on a curb illegally to tell me that I need to drive safer because HE has a baby in the car. Naturally Jon is pissed because this guy is calling me every name in the book and starts yelling back at him. I wanted to pull away but I couldn't because the car in front of me was still waiting for traffic to pass. I look down to roll the window up and start to ignore him when I see something flying at me. This guy just hocked a lugie at me from his car.

Holy crap are you serious? I can honestly say that I did nothing wrong to deserve this. I didn't cut him off, I didn't push him off the road, I didn't flip him off, all I did was maintain my lane and this guy is absolutely psychotic. My confusion quickly turned to outrageous anger and humiliation. A man spitting on a woman just may be one of the most degrading things. At this point Jon has the door open and is ready to jump out and beat the crap out of this guy but I convince him not to. The car takes off (by jumping the car off the curb) and tries to run. Of course still confused I call the police. We start following the car (at a distance) and while on the phone with the operator a hand comes from the backseat and is waving for us to follow like "Come on lets go" kind of egging on, I doubt at this point they knew the police were on the phone. I follow them to the Sunset Station parking lot where they start to circle. They finally stop at a stop sign, park their car, both get out and leave their NEWBORN BABY alone in the car to confront us.

At this point the doors are locked and the windows are up as I am still talking to the operator. They start screaming and yelling at us, telling us to get out of the car and "take care of this" then it is F this and F that (oh I forgot to mention that the passenger in the car is the MOTHER of the newborn and these two were probably younger than Jon and I...aaaannnnd I had Braden in the car) I just sat there and let them scream at me and freak out as I saw the police cars coming. As soon as the realize the cops are coming, all of a sudden the guy is trying to get his baby mam or whatever back in the car, making it look like he wasn't part of the entire thing. Even with the cop pulled up the girl wont stop freaking out on us. The guy is instructed to put his hands on the hood of the car and starts being questioned while she is STILL talking shit. But I never said a word, partially because at this point I am hysterical and freaked out. They get his side and our side then says they can't really do anything because they didn't see the incident and the asshole denied spitting on me (which isn't really a surprise even though I still had some in my hair) I had no proof. I could have pressed charges but he wouldn't have been arrested or even ticketed we would have just ended up going to court.

All I kept thinking about is if this guy is acting like this because I didn't slam on my brakes to let him cut me off, imagine if I ended up dragging their asses to court. I didn't want to deal with it. So I decided not to press any charges even though I wanted to . I was a wreck the rest of the day, you wouldn't think something like that would have a huge effect on you but it does. It is sick that people are like that. I hate people sometimes and I don't understand what goes through someones mind before they do something like that. I almost feel bad for those people, I mean how bad is their life going that something so small (and their fault) would set them off like that? What posses a new mother to leave her newborn parked in the middle of the street to confront someone? I guess I am lucky they didn't have a gun and next time I will probably just let myself get cut off, because this shit just isn't worth it to me. I can only hope that karma comes around to them someday and someone spits on them, then maybe they will see what jackasses they are, but then again people like that never seem to learn from their mistakes because they are never big enough to take responsibility for their actions.

If you want to be such a bad ass and spit on a woman it just makes you look like a jackass and an idiot if you deny it. You wanna be a hard ass? Admit to your shit, then maybe you regain some of yourself. Hardcore people admit to their crimes because it makes them feel like bad asses and they don't care if they go to jail because they are proud of themselves. How could a woman even want to be with someone like that? If he does that to a total stranger imagine what he will do to his baby mama, maybe they are meant for each other. Sorry for the rant but "That's what blogs are foooooooor"

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

'Cause I'm just like a honey bee.........

I love how everything can turn into a No Doubt song!

Ok I hate to talk about the same crap over and over but it makes me feel better to write it out so sorry! Today Jon was yet again moved only this time it was him and his friend Danny. They were put on their own section all day. A little into the start of the project one of the higher ups that is for sure safe until the end poked his head into Jon's area and said "Hey if you guys can finish this by today you are safe from another lay-off." The only problem was that this task was nearly impossible for just two people to finish in a day. Nonetheless they worked the entire day to finish it, no breaks no lunch no nothing and still didn't finish. I am almost positive that they are going to get the boot regardless of what they do, and the others are just messing with them, which if they are that is nothing more than childish and stupid. These are supposed to be grown men. In the construction business your safety doesn't depend on just one day, if they are going to be gone, they will be gone regardless if they finished the task or not.

Of course I had my breakdown today trying to figure out what we are going to do and being pregnant doesn't help when you have to stay strong. We hope he has something else lined up but you just never know. We have money saved but my biggest fear is we go through all of our savings and it still ends up not being enough. I am so sick to death of crying and whining about this, I really am. Crying feels good at the time but it solves nothing! Hopefully all this worry is for nothing and his connections pull through. Send us good "hope you get a job quick" vibes! Since it fits the theme here is the lyrics to the song that describes me to a tee.....enjoy and I will try to make my next entry witty and fun :)

No Doubt---Blue in the Face

Just like a bee rushing to a comb of honey
Why can't you see you look so very funny
You worry yourself sick till you're blue in the face

Relax and sleep, tomorrow isn't leaving
And counting your sheep won't relieve you from this grieving
You worry yourself sick till you're blue in the face
But you'll make ends meet I know you will so please pull up a chair
Take your time the world's not going anywhere
Honey, you worry yourself sick till you're blue in the face

Blue in the face
'Cause you're always in a hurry
Blue in the face
'Cause you always tend to worry
You're just like a honey bee, you panic, you sting, then you die

It's just like you to fret like you do
So take the afternoon and maybe someday soon
You won't have to worry yourself sick till you're blue in the face
But you'll make ends meet I know you will so please pull up a chair
Take your time the world's not going anywhere
Honey, you worry yourself sick till you're blue in the face

Blue in the face
'Cause you're always in a hurry
Blue in the face
'Cause you always tend to worry
You're just like a honey bee, you panic, you sting, then you die
You're just like a honey bee zap!

...Oh, when you're in a state of mind they call anxiety
And you find it very necessary to pull out your hair
Don't be discouraged
Oh, honey have courage
Don't worry yourself sick till you're blue in the face
Like always you worry till you're blue in the face
Honey why worry yourself sick till you're blue in the face

You're always in a hurry
Blue in the face
You always tend to worry
Cause you're just like a honey bee, you panic, you sting, then you die
Just like a honey bee

Blue in the face
You got no time to waste
Slow down the pace
You're turning blue, blue, blue

Blue in the face
You got no time to waste
Slow down the pace
You're turning blue

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Heeeeere we go

Yesterday everyone at Jons job got transferred under one guy...which is the beginning of the end for the most part. He has been told that he is on the "do not lay-off" list for now, but things can change very quickly in his line of work. As much as I have been stressing out, I know there is nothing I can do to change what will happen. Hopefully he is good for another month and we can keep saving! Best case senario is that something comes along and he doesn't miss more than a day or two of work.....that would be awesome! Whatever happens we will make it work :)

Monday, September 21, 2009

Dream a little dream

I don't know what it is about being pregnant that brings out the most crazy, vivid, and beautiful dreams! The best part is I can actually remember them! Last night I had a dream I had a girl and she was perfect and beautiful :)

I had a dream about Braden when I was pregnant with him too but I could never see his face. I got to see her face in this dream and she looked like the perfect mix of Jon and I. We will find out if I am right about the baby being a girl in about a month....but I am pretty convinced!

Friday, September 18, 2009

What else is new?

You know I really wish I could be one of those people who can turn their mind off before they go to bed.

It makes me crazy how tired I am and how when I get into my nice cozy bed all I can do is think. I haven't always been this way, it seems to have started after I had Braden which makes me wonder how much of a nutcase I will be after this baby comes.

Things are ok right now but everyday we are waiting for Jon to get laid off. We know it is going to happen we just don't know WHEN. I am constantly worried that when he gets laid off there won't be any work, and we will lose everything. We decided to try for this baby because we felt secure and I am scared things are going to end up like they did when we had Braden.

Braden wasn't planned but you have to go with the flow. When he was born we were BROKE, maybe pulling in $750 every two weeks. Some months we couldn't pay rent and had to borrow money from our parents for diapers and formula. I always said that when we had another one things would be different and I really hope that is the case. I don't want to live paycheck to paycheck ever again and we are going to do everything we can to make sure that doesn't happen.

I suppose everything always has a way of working themselves out and "everything happens for a reason" Jon and I have dealt with bigger problems before and have come out just fine. I need to be able to accept the fact that worrying profusely everyday will not change anything that is going to happen. I know that but it doesn't stop my mind from over analyzing everything we do and every penny we spend. This stress and anxiety is exhausting and probably not the best for me. *sigh* I could really use a day on a beach right now....

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Good News!

SO yaaaay! There is a baby in my belly :)

We are sooo excited!

BTW wouldn't that bag make the PERFECT diaper bag??

My birthday is coming up ya know :)

Monday, September 7, 2009

Change of pace

Normally I like to be funny and witty on my blog but sometimes things need to be said that aren't so fun. One thing I absolutely CANNOT stand is any kind of ill will or maliciousness towards a child. It makes me crazy.

I have talked about my "dads" new wife( easily considered an Evil Stepmother, eventhough she would probably love being called that) on many many occasions and the events that have occurred between us. I put his name in quotations because he is nothing even close to a father or even a father figure for that matter, and he disgusts me. His wife has done everything in her power to push me out and make a relationship with him difficult and has also succeeded in doing so. Honestly I am a big girl and that is fine, I have moved on and gotten over it and man is my life so much better without them! Since she has succeeded in attacking me to no end and I am not there anymore for her to mess with she has now moved on to my 12 year old sister. What a sick twisted sad person, picking on a little girl.

When I was having problems with this individual it was much easier. I didn't have to go there every other weekend and I wasn't 12. I was able to stand up for myself and fight back and eventually move on with my life. My sister is really stuck and it breaks my heart. His wife manipulates, attacks (not physically) and brings my sister down so much that it is hard to watch. She calls my sister names, doesn't appreciate her, and doesn't even trust her to be alone with her 7 year old son. I have never seen anyone act so terribly to a child and it honestly takes everything in me to stop myself from beating the crap out of this girl. I don't know if she had some effed up childhood or why she feels the need to make children feel like crap but I don't think it is ok. Oh and by the way she is only 2 years older than me so it makes it even harder for my sister to accept that she has to listen to someone almost the same age as her sister.

I am a very nice person and I get along with a lot of people, but when I love I love hard. If you burn me it sucks to be you, and if you mess with my family you should probably make every effort to not cross paths with me. The simple solution to this would be to bring all of this to her Dads attention right? Wrong. He is a spineless piece of work who believes his precious wife always means well and would never purposely hurt someones feelings, and let me tell you how sick it is. For a while I never understood the term "whipped" but now I do. He can't do anything without asking her first and it is annoying. It is very hard to have respect for someone who can't think. I know I sound harsh right now but there is sooo much history that I am allowed to be like this!

Getting back to my sister though I will say she is one of the nicest, well behaved, responsible and loving 12 year old girls I have ever met. She hardly talks back (well she IS 12! lol) and is just so sweet, so when I hear of someone talking bad to her it is hard not to turn into the Incredible Hulk. Children are so innocent and I hate when people close to them belittle them just to feel better about themselves as some sick kind of release. Anyone who chooses another person over their children is sick and confused in my opinion. I don't think I would understand all of this if I wasn't a mother. I have no respect for anyone who cant listen to their children and always take their side. Your children are forever, and they love you unconditionally. But you can only push a kid aside so much until they get older and wiser and move on to better themselves.

I really hope that he gets his shit in order and realizes what he is doing before it is too late. It is already too late for mine and his relationship and I would hate for him to end up a very lonely old sad man. In the end it is ultimately his loss, but I really honestly hope that his hag wises up and learns some maturity and treats my sister better and he takes it upon himself for once in his life to tell her that she can't talk to his daughter like that. Grow some balls dude and try to act like a man and a father.....for once

Thursday, September 3, 2009

I have come to realize

I have done this before and like to revise it every so often and encourage everyone else to do it too :)

I have come to realize:

I will never have the perfect body
I will never be a perfect mother
People closest to you hurt you the most when they let you down
Never doesn't always mean never
Mid life crises do exist
You never get used to losing people you love
You can forgive but hardly forget
I have a lot to learn
My mother made me who I am
Motherhood is exciting, terrifying,a dn rewarding all at the same time
I have no idea what I want to do with my life
I am a good person
The drama doesn't stop after high lessens
There is always someone out there who will try to bring you down
People do deserve second chances...just not third, fourth, or fifth
Some people will never change
I do not regret anything
I am a strong person
Sometimes I take things for granted
My son changed my outlook on life
Sometimes it is better to shut your mouth even if you know you are right
I can't fix everyones much as I want to
Laughter is the best medicine most of the time
I have the best family and friends (ok I have known that for a loooong time)
I can be needy
I love to be loved
It is ok to be wrong

Ok your turn!

Thursday, August 13, 2009


08/07/09 will officially go down as one of the best nights of my life. I know I sound like a freak to a lot of people for the ways I love No Doubt, bbut deal with it. I almost didn't go to this concert but I decided to anyway. It was one of the longest days ever, but it had the best outcome ever!
I got to the Hard Rock at 3:30 p.m. to start waiting in line for the concert (I had GA seats). The show didn't even start until 8, so I knew I was going ot be there for a while. Before we could get in the actual line security put us in this sort of "holding tank" to keep us from blocking doorways and stuff, basically we were a fire hazard. By 4 p.m. they let us line along the side of the hallway to the new Joint where we waited until about 5 p.m. STANDING....we were NOT aloud to sit down at all!
Since I was an ever exclusive No Doubt Fan Club Memeber (yes you may laugh now) I was hand picked from the line I was already in to be in a special VIP line...oooooooo! That line was much shorter but we STILL coulnt sit down! We waited in that line until 6 before they let us start herding into the venue so we could find a spot. While all of the people started getting 4-5 people deep in the center of the standing floor, I found a nice place to the left right up front (I have no problem being next to the subwoofers). It is at this spot I meet Chet my "designated secuirty guard" and he was awesome. We made signals in case I was getting crushed so he could get me out and he was telling me all the crazy stuff he has seen working these shows. He also gave me some dirt on Gwen but I will pretend she is not a diva and won't talk about what I heard. While waiting I meet this 15 year old girl who knows almost every security guard, has an iphone and is "Only here to see Panic At The Disco" psh I am assuming that since she was bragging about going to so many shows and making it known that she knows everyone in the damn building that mommy or daddy is either rich or owns the damn place. I couldn't get over the fact that she was waiting that long just to see the opening band. My friend Sarah and I convinced her to give No Doubt a shot.
Janel Sarah and I made friends with the guy and his lady friend behind us and were having a good time waiting for everything to start, eventhough by now I had been standing for 4 1/2 hours and my back was starting to hurt. Show starts and it is good so far The Sounds plays and Panic. Then No Doubt starts and it is glorious lol! Gwen is so beautiful it makes me sick. Her abs are to die for and does not look anywhere near her age of 40! She pauses throughout the show and brings people up on stage for pictures, signs autographs and takes things that people brought for her....signs, scrapbook, etc. So personable it was awesome! Although she didnt talk to me or anything but I didnt have anything cool to give her!
Then halfway through the show I see Janel exchanging words with this guy behind us. I ask her whats wrong and she says that he has been grinding his "thingy" on her for like 10 minutes. She took her elbow to push him off of her and he SHOVES her and starts getting in her face. Secuirty saw him and yelled at him but didn't take him out. I then exchanged words with him and he got in MY face! What a piece of shit, if you are a "man" and think pushing women around physically makes you a bad ass you are stupid. It makes you an insecure little penis moron. Fron there he continued to talk shit the rest of the might calling us fat, stupid, whores, and whatever...mind you this guy was like in his 30's or 40's and I couldnt figure out why he was grinding on Janel because every time I saw him he was rubbing up on a guy. Anyway he asked the secuirty guard to pull him out about 30minutes later and we didn't see him again. Yeah thats right you better run! haha
They played for like 2 hours and I caught two of Tom's guitar picks! I was so excited! yaaay! While we were exiting there is a binch of girls hounding this guy and I turn to Janel and say "Is that Carey Hart?" She goes "YES!" Wwe run up and get a picture and there are all these little skanky girls who got mad that we slipped in for a picture and one of them says to me "Hurry the fuck up he has to go!" I just ignored her, I wanted to tell her how cute it was that she was dressed up like a Harajuku Girl and how 3 years ago it was, and how pigtails are NOT cute unless you are 5 but I thought I would let her think she was so irresitably cute and hot that Carey would snatch her up and have his way with her (and then Pink would beat the crap out of her!). After that all we wanted to do was sit, so we did for about an hour so I could feel my legs again. We walked Sarah outside where her husband was waiting to pick her up and decided to leave. Then Janel suggested we go hang out by the tour busses for a little bit and see if we could see anyone. I didn't want to but she talked me into it.
We sat on a curn right by the busses for a while and I guess one of the bus drivers felt bad for us because he brought us food and drinks. He was awesome, he said "If you guys are waiting for Gwen she already went to bed, she has her kids." I told him I just wanted to see ANYONE! We didn't know that on the other side of the busses Tom and Tony were signing autographs and posing for pictures, but oh well. We sit for about an hour and then I look up and see Tom walking across the parking lot to his bus. I froze for a minute and then started screaming his name. He looked at me hesitant and I said please! Just one picture! He said "Ok come on!" and Janel and I ran over there. I sounded like a blubbering idiot saying "We were in the front row" "you are so awesome" and "you don't know what this means" but I was trying to talk so I didn't look like a school girl and cry. He took 3 pictures with us, which I was so thankful for because I don't think he wanted to come over to us at all. I told him I didn't want to bug him for an autograph hoping he would say "Oh no problem I'll give ya one" but instead he said "Ok!" and went to his bus. After that we made friends with a lot of the workers and they were telling us stories and just general bullshitting. We went to Tonys bus but his very rude assistant or whoever she was said "Tony is done for the night!" so we walked away and watched from afar. I did see him come out for a second but then he ran back in his bus.
We sat there until the busses left and I picked out whick one I thought was Gwen's. Eventhough I didn't get to meet all of them, or Gwen I still had an awesome night. It is amazing to love a band for 14 years and then finally come face to face with them and get a picture with one! Front row, guitar picks and stalking........true night of a fan :)

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Happy Birthday Braden!

1 day old

2 days old

1 month old

1 year old

2 years old

3 years old

Today my little baby pumpkin is 4 years old. Seriously 4! They always say that they grow up fast but when you are getting up every two hours to feed, change diapers, and get puked on it doesn't feel like it is going so fast, but it does. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I hope one day he understands that. He is so smart and beautiful that he gets mad when I just want to cuddle him. Being a mom is the most rewarding thing I have ever experienced. I guess he was worth the 16 hours of labor :)

As I am writing this heartfelt message, I just had to turn around and yell at my precious little man for "making" a stool and trying to climb up the cabinets....oh motherhood.

Being a mom has its ups and downs but thats life. Over the past 4 years these are some of the things I have discovered:

1. Being puked on isn't so bad after the 3rd time.

2. Getting drool in your mouth is ALWAYS gross

3. It is normal for little boys to "pop" things spontaneously, it doesn't mean anything, you don't turn them on when you change a diaper!

4. I will never ever sleep the same again

5. Toddler poop is the worst

6. Kids are like parrots

7. I think I have the best child in the world (as does every mom)

8. I am constantly worried

9. Tantrums are really funny....when it's other peoples kids throwing them

10. My idea of "going out" now is getting to go to dinner with Jon.....alone

11. Boys constantly have their hands down their pants....its like they found a toy or something

12. A toddlers favorite word is "why" or "no"

13. Braden finds "Time-Out" comical

14. Toddlers have short-term memory and you have to repeat things many times

15. Stretch marks are battle scars.....but I still prefer to hide them

I could go on and on but I won't, those are just a few of the things I have learned throughout the years. I am so proud of my big boy and can only hope that I am molding him into an honest, loving, and respectful person. I love you Bookie Boy :)

Monday, July 27, 2009

THIS made me lol

"Oh my God he is crying!!!"

I am so glad I NEVER got like that over a boy band......ever........I swear


Thursday, July 23, 2009

Why not me? I would use that!!

Well I have been trying to get pregnant for about 3 months now (without Jon knowing...KIDDING lol) and obviously it has not happened yet. While that alone is hard to deal with, the hardest part is it seems everyone around me is getting pregnant without even really trying! Don't get me wrong I am very happy for those who are going to have a baby but I would be lying if I said I wasn't jealous.

Sometimes I ask myself "Are you crazy, you actually WANT to have another baby??" It is weird to say that I am looking forward to and want the morning sickness, the strech marks, weight gain, back pain, overall uncomfortablness, mood swings and no sleep, but I do. Pregnancy was not easy for me but I loved it. It scares the crap out of me but I am ready to take on all of that again.

I know I worry way too much about everything but the baby department is not a place I thought I would have a problem. Braden was the result of missing 2 whole pills, so I always thought that when I was ready for another one it would happen on the first try. I know I am probably looking way too much into it and adding stress to myself which is not helping, but it is hard not to think about. In addition to this stress my body is also pretty pissed at me for taking away its nicotine fix (which I have stuck to and been smoke free for 4 days).

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and I suppose it will happen when it is supposed to. The more I analyze it the more I am going to drive myself insane. I just need to relax *sign* Wish us luck :)

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

An open letter to Gwen Stefani.....

Ok is this???? These bags are hideous......bleh! I mean is that rubber in there RUBBER? Gwen you are supposed to be a fashion icon and you put out this crap? Ok I know this isn't the ENTIRE line and there MIGHT be something I like down the road but the preview you have released does not look good. Well, maybe I should thank you, because these bags are so ugly I will not be dropping $500+ on one this season and I can actually save some money. Nevermind the almost $500 I have spent on No Doubt tickets this year, oh pish posh! I seriously hope that you go back to the drawing board and pump out some fabulousity for the Spring '10 line missy!
P.S. I still love you!!!

Tuesday, July 21, 2009


Hello blogging world!

First blog entries are always a little awkward. You don't want to say too much or too little. Anyways I'm Brittany, and I'm pretty fantastic. I am a wife and a mom and I love it all too much! I don't really need to get into a long history about myself because I am sure along the lines I will bitch about something that can tie into a story from the past. I'm just cool like that!

Today is the second day in my I'm quitting smoking journey. I have decided to quit for a few reasons.

  1. I want to live a long time

  2. I hate smoking outside in the summer with the bugs!

  3. I want to set a good example for Braden

  4. It smells yucky!

It is harder than I thought it would be. I guess I never really wanted to admit that I am ADDICTED...I preferred to say that I "just enjoyed" it. I don't think I am doing all that terrible, it has been exactly 39 hours since I have had a cigarette and I have only needed to chew 3 Nicorette gums, OK so I bought the knock off brand WHATEVER!

I decided to find out the immediate benefit to quitting smoking and here's what I found:

20 minutes after my last cigarette my body went through the following changes:

  • my blood pressure decreased

  • my pulse rate dropped

  • and my body temperature went up

8 hours after my last cigarette:

  • Carbon monoxide levels in the blood return to normal

  • Oxygen levels in blood return to normal

24 hours after my last cigarette:

  • chance of heart attack decreases (scary!)

48 hours after my last cigarette (and where I currently am):

  • Nerve endings start regrowing (what??)

  • Ability to smell and taste is enhanced (great not I'll be hungry more)

  • Shortness of breath decreases

So it is nice to know there are some benefits since we are a world of "get immediate results"

Now if I could just find a diet or a magic pill to make weight fall off IMMEDIATELY!