Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Last entry....

Today the house finally closed.  After 6 months of Wells Fargo dragging their feet it is finally over.  I have cried, screamed, felt defeated, felt optimistic, and now I kind of feel nothing.  Losing the house was one if the hardest things I have ever experienced.  Jon losing his job at the time wasnt our fault, losing my job because I was pregnant wasnt my fault either but the bank didnt care.  There isnt enough time for me to say how disgusting Wells Fargo is when it comes to their "valued customers".  They dont look at you like a person, you are simply a number (as is with most big banks).  They are your best friend when everything is going well, but will completely turn their back on you when you need them the most.  Just so you know, they are not your friends.  I will never know how those people sleep at night in their mansions knowing how they make their money.

My range of emotions at this given time are wide.  While I am happy it is over,  I am also sad and devastated at the same time.  We watched this place be built from a patch of dirt, we picked out every single thing in that house, we brought home two of our babies in that house, and now it is just gone.  Someone paid half the price I did (literally) and all of my memories inside of the house will be erased when they list it as a rental.  I probably sound ridiculous, trust me I know it is just a house, but it was our FIRST house as a family and I feel it was ripped out from under me. 

It was never going to be our forever house, we always intended it to be a starter and use it to get to where we wanted to be eventually.  With time I know I wont hurt so much, and I WILL get over this and move on, but I am entitled to a so called "grieving" phase and how long that takes I dont know.  I feel like this is the first step to a whole new me.  I will be starting a new blog and fill it with whatever I please.  Its time I make myself happy in all aspects of my life and this blog has a lot of negative energy on it (not ALL but a lot).

I have to say I am incredibly proud of Jon and I.  In one month it will be our 5 year anniversary (married 9 years together) and the last 3 1/2 have been very hard on us, and yet we have stuck by each other.  Yes we have fought, yes we have had our hard times but we have been strong enough to get through it all together.  With the divorce rate in this country I think many people would have called it quits.  Being both Virgos I'm happy our equally strong personalities didnt get the best of us, and we have done what we have neeeded to do to survive and ensure our childrens happiness.  I cant say enough good things about my husband, he is just the best. 

When I have the new blog up I will share, and promise to write often (yeah yeah yeah I know I have said that before)

So cheers to new beginnings and moving on, it is almost always for the best and in our case it is without a doubt a positive thing

1 comment:

  1. I love you so much, and I am so proud of you both! It will get better with time, as does all are my sunshine, and always will be. xoxoxo